November 09, 2001
anger management 101 my mother is fervently religious, even to the point of fanaticism at times. it makes me crazy. we can't even have a conversation anymore, without it turning into a big religious debate. and i don't think it's entirely healthy.
for example...whenever she experiences some great success in her life, she automatically attributes it to god. she gives herself absolutely no credit, no props for working hard, beating the odds, making the right choice. now...how can that possibly be healthy for someone who has suffered from low self-esteem for her entire life??
but you know what? her religious fervor finally makes sense to me. i mean, she had to turn to someone, something, for forgiveness. for what she did to my father...my sister...and me. right?
it may seem like i'm being too hard on her. maybe i am. but i am still just so angry. as we speak, i'm waiting for my (former) therapist to return my call. she helped me through a really rough time a few years back, for about a year. she asked all the right (i.e., tough) questions...forced me to consider things i hadn't yet considered ...listened at the right times...offered a different perspective when i needed it...prescribed just the right anti-depressant medication (which, thankfully, didn't need to be permanent)...and gave me homework after every session. hopefully, she can help me to figure out the right thing to do with all this anger.
1:44 PM
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