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i am: 40...a capricorn / moon in pisces / libra rising...an old soul with a young spirit...older than i look...contemplating my 3rd tattoo...NOT a web designer...a lesbian...working things out with the g.f....a native iowan...a graduate of cornell college and ohio state...a critical reader and thinker...really rather shy...agnostic...an ardent feminist...a bleeding-heart liberal...a pacifist...and so not your average white grrl...
e-mail me
feeling generous? *grin*
Who Links Here
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September 16, 2003
not half the bitchso, in the last few weeks, my sister and i have only just started to communicate again. i called and left a message for her on her birthday in late july, and she e-mailed a thank-you (albeit 2 weeks later). in a message the week after labor day, she told me that her sister-in-law, kim, had just had a baby girl. kim was the one who, at the wedding, had really gone out of her way to make sure that s was comfortable and having a good time, while i was preoccupied with the string of relatives i hadn't seen in years (including an 8-year-old niece i had not, until that point, even met). when we found out that she was pregnant, s and i decided immediately that we would send her a little something for the baby after it was born...to let her know how much her efforts during the wedding weekend had been appreciated.
in her e-mail, my sister had written that the baby had been born "on saturday at about 10 a.m."...meaning, saturday, august 30. the wife of a colleague and friend of mine is a professional tile maker, so s and i decided to ask her to make a tile to commemorate the baby's birth, which would include her name and birth date. in a conversation with my mom last nite, she mentioned a different birth date, so i decided i'd better verify the date with my sister. so i e-mailed her this morning. she replied:Lis - I thought that I just said in the email that she was born over Labor Day weekend, but if I goofed - her birthday is 8/31. so i sent my sister a quick reply:yup, you goofed. hopefully, it's not too late to make the change! thanks. then, i scrambled to make sure that our tile-maker friend hadn't inscribed the date yet (luckily, she hadn't).
in retrospect, while i certainly hadn't wanted to belabor the point, i had wanted to make her aware that it had been her mistake and not mine...but therein lies my error. she responded:Lis - the email jabs aren't cool. I am sorry that I wrote Saturday instead of Sunday. Neither of us knew you were focused on the date. If either we had, at least one us would've been careful to doublecheck and confirm the date of 8/31 (instead of writing the day of the week) - just like getting you the address. Honestly, it was an unintentional mistake that I'm sorry for, but I also think that it could've been avoided if we had just known that you were using the date - a quick phone call or even an email clarifying that you needed the date would've been all it would've taken. *sigh*
my reply, you may ask?jesus fucking christ!! you really need to lighten up. it wasn't intended as a "jab". i was simply responding to your use of the word "if"...as in, IF you had goofed...because guess what? you HAD!! you ARE capable of making mistakes! ooooh, THERE'S a newsflash. i am soooooo sorry that you didn't get the joke. my bad!
you know, it never occurred to me that this was anything other than an unintentional mistake. what, you think i'm sitting here picking apart every fucking little thing you say, in an attempt to find wrongdoing of some sort, so that i can call you on it? ummmm, no...that would be YOU. give me a fucking break. you're such a fucking drama queen. it is NOT always all about you. and the world is not out to get you.
okay. so i didn't really say that. my actual reply wasn't the least bit caustic. i explained. i assumed the blame (because with my sister, someone's got to, and it's certainly not gonna be her) for not making the fact that i was joking clear enough. i conveyed that it was a moot point, anyway, because it wasn't too late to change the date. i kept the peace.
because, you see...i'm not half the bitch i wanna be.
1:04 PM
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