March 28, 2004
i'm baaaaack....on a completely different note....
the new job is good. i am completely and totally exhausted by a) the learning curve and b) the fact that i happened to start 3 weeks before 5 proposal deadlines fall within in a two-day period (april 1-2), so it's definitely a "trial-by-fire" kind of situation. i pretty much collapse every night when i get home and am worthless for anything more than feeding the cats, feeding myself (if i'm lucky), and getting my execu-drag ready for the following day. it's pitiful.
but it's all good. friday was a banner day. i gave a draft of a proposal to my boss, admitting to her that i felt like i was totally winging it. i mean, i really don't feel like i have the slightest idea what i'm doing. but she gave it back to me a few hours later, saying it looked great and she wouldn't change a thing. the program people still have to look it over, but...wow. that felt good. maybe i won't fall flat on my face and make them rue the day they ever hired me, after all.
and people there seem to be pretty cool. the whole "coming out" issue hasn't surfaced yet, so time will tell...but so far, so good. most everyone's been helpful and friendly and no one seems psycho (that's always a good sign).
the only really weird thing is that we are on total computer lockdown. no one is allowed access to their own hard-drives (thanks to all the renegades who downloaded all kinds of shit, fucked up their computers, and freaked out the computer support staff), so i can't do so much as change my own screen saver, let alone download software, delete cookies, or ensure the privacy of my own e-mail or web habits (no more blogging, no more shopping...it's downright crippling!). between that and making the mac-to-pc adjustment, i am not a happy computer user, at least not at work. and, after staring at the screen for 6-8 hours a day, i'm just not all that anxious to jump on the computer once i get home, especially given the exhaustion...hence, the blog-lag. it's just going to take some time to adjust and get into the habit of using my computer at home.
but...i guess that's why they call it "work". who knew?
1:52 AM
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